It is no use asking You how You are because You are me and I am You and I am not doing well so I imagine the same is with You.

I cry every night and pray Your Son will soon bring me to our beloved.

I think of You being the Host to the loved ones who are no longer with me and I know their happiness is beyond my comprehension. I envy them.

My fellow beings talk about how natural it is to grieve the loss of a loved one. And yet The Creator in guiding our evolution of consciousness has seen to a response of intractable resistance to a life of quality after she is gone. How natural is it that grief may ask more than we can give and in the giving succumb to a shadow of our self?

You know 64 years and I’m still not sure Original Sin is reason enough to demand a death sentence. Just thought I would give my opinion on that for what it’s worth.

Hey! You sure Bette and I got the right script? The curtain comes down too damn early!

Why does death render us dumb not as in stupid though one can feel quite inadequate in wrapping your mind around what just occurred but in having little voice in speaking to the unbearable grief.

You know my Dear Fellow or Madam there is no moving on. For the time I had with Bette there is no parallel or surpassing. I am beautifully, wonderfully, and happily stuck in the moment.

It is hard writing to an entity especially when it is accepted by many that ‘said’ entity knows what you’re going to write before you write it. Be that as it may. A thought came to mind as I sat on the couch with legs crossed at the ankles. I was sitting for an hour before this thought came along and I’m grateful I was able to go that long without a significant thought. Then I thought I thought this thought before and thought I was in good Company. Here is the thought: There is so much written about You and at 64 years of age I’ve read just the tiniest fraction. What I find curious is I end up on a road of fear and no one bothered to give me a map so I could be guided by choice. How or why is it that many are more interested in the ‘how’ of things and less the ‘why’? It could be that most of us leave the ‘why’ to You like good creatures and pursue the ‘how’ in order to make something of this life. There are some current thinkers, held in high regard, who say philosophy is dead; I think they are on to something. I’m surprised it took this long seeing how every life succumbs to death and the loved ones have only grief to make sense of it.

I’m sure I’ll write again and I’d be honored if You’d give Bette my love.